Books and more

I’m still on the major reading kick, but I’ve slowed down a bit. Dan Brown’s new book The Origin sapped a lot out of me. While I like the early Dan Brown books (both his Langdon series and the stand-alones), I’ve become tired with his style and formulaic approach. I ended up skimming the second half of the book and then turning it over to Mike to read as he still really enjoys them. To each their own. He doesn’t denigrate my literary choices, and I don’t his.

I’ve literally had no time to look for a new job the past few weeks, which has been depressing. It’s just such a process to sit down and search, and then edit cover letters and resumes to try and tailor it to that position. Apply. Wait. Rinse. Repeat. I did get a line on a website to pick up some part-time hours doing proofreading and editing, so I’m going to look into that more thoroughly this week. We definitely need the added cash flow. We’re barely breaking even, if we are at all at this point. Fucking student loans.

My therapist claims that I’ve just about reached the point where we can say I’ve “graduated” from therapy. He’s been impressed with how I’ve jumped into using the techniques he’s been teaching me with both feet. To be fair though, a lot of this I already knew. It just seems like after the episode on August that I lost that skill and had to rebuild from almost scratch. The one thing I don’t like about the place where I get therapy is that a lot of the therapists have religious training of some sort, and reference God and whatnot. So far mine hadn’t done that, until this week. Being an atheist, I was trying really hard to roll my eyes, but I was unsure how to approach it say, ‘yeah, that doesn’t work for me’ without being rude. Then again, he technically works for me, so maybe it’s worth revisiting when I see him in a few weeks. Just a friendly reminder that I don’t buy in to that, and while I appreciate where he’s coming from it’s just not helpful. Maybe it’s better to let sleeping dogs lie, especially if I’m almost done with him barring a quick check in here or there. But their connection with Christian religion made me somewhat wary about being seen there in the first place. Something to think about.

I’ve had some interesting conversations with a few people this week that have confided in me that they suffer from mental illness. One in particular is insisting on treating her depression “holistically” under the treatment of a “healer” (whatever that is). She’s modified her diet to some diet she read about on the internet, is taking St. John’s Wort and Vitamin D, but she’s refusing to do any kind of therapy because she’s convinced herself that they’ll force her onto meds. Now, I have no problem with integrating diet and vitamins into treatment plans (hell, I take vitamin D every night during the winter and when I’m on night shift), but she is far from stable. And I’m not sure the diagnosis of just depression is completely accurate. But I’m not her, I gave my opinion when she asked me, and that’s that. She can do whatever she feels is right for her. I don’t have to agree with it. But I hate watching someone spiral out of control because they eschew psychiatric medicine or treatment. I’m aware that I’m one of those people that need the psych meds and probably always will. I don’t think everyone is in that same boat, but I also believe that there are times that forgoing treatment for is just an exercise in futility and that you’re more likely to watch your life crash and burn. I don’t know. I just hate watching people struggle when they don’t have to.