Major irritations, but I kept my cool

I started off this morning with my store manager telling me that I’ve finally been assigned a store, and unfortunately it wasn’t that one. I’d start at the new store on Sunday.

Cool.

About an hour later, it was off. And then it was back on. And off. And then on, but I’ll start the week of the 2nd rather than this Sunday. You get the picture. This went on all. damn. day.

But I kept my cool. Despite my annoyance, I kept my cool and generally didn’t let it show. There was one customer that tried my patience, but I didn’t snap, I wasn’t rude. Maybe a bit short, but I kept it together. Considering I’m very prone to irritability, this was huge.

I’m proud of myself.

I also went to the gym today. I didn’t need a pep talk to go in, I just got there, went in, and did it. And then I came home and get everything on my list done, despite my desire to come home and sit on my butt and watch SVU.

A lot of small victories today.

Of course, things were going so well

I FUCKING HATE IRRITABILITY! And to make matters worse, I’m irritable that I’m irritable. It’s like a never ending cycle.

This morning was fine. Had a nice lunch. And then, we went to Walmart. Two Saturdays before Christmas and we had to go to Walmart. I hate Walmart on a Saturday to begin with. It’s too people-y. Today was even worse. The irritability spiked somewhere in dairy, which is also about the time I realized that, not only did I not take my meds this morning, but also that it would be too late to take them by the time I got home.

And now I’m crashing. God damn it. I hate feeling like this. Things were going so well.

I’m hoping this is just a blip. Please, let this be a blip. Just a bad day. I can’t afford for it to be any more than that. I don’t want to go through this. Not now. Not when everything was starting to come together.